Untangling the Web # 1: The Girl Effect

Being completely disillusioned that I am with the manner in which I spend my time online, I have decided to find something amazing, useful, informative or just funny, every time I log in to the internet, and post it here. I will try finding something around:
Literature
Poetry
Cinema
Essays
Music
Trivia
Satire
And yes, the occassional Santa-Banta joke.
among others, for your entertainment and mine. :)

Here's my first installation of the same.
A Youtube video by The Girl Effect which spells out how girls can end poverty for themselves and the world.
Simple and powerful.
:)

We Are A Deep Conversation.

"It's a still life water color, 
Of a now late afternoon, 
As the sun shines through the curtained lace 
And shadows wash the room. 
And we sit and drink our coffee 
Couched in our indifference, 
Like shells upon the shore 
You can hear the ocean roar 
In the dangling conversation 
And the superficial sighs, 
The borders of our lives. "
-The Dangling Conversation, Simon and Garfunkel

You can say I am an enthusiastic collector of subjective experiences. I tend to weigh one against the other, add, subtract, divide, multiply, and create the outline of a story where you and I play active or passive roles, sometimes just a cameo. I enjoy thinking all of us, the entire population of the planet, and all their combined activities, thought and emotions are collectively responsible for the feelings I feel, the things that I do and the society I live in. I enjoy believing that even as we are silent, we are in deep conversation with each other at some intrinsic level. Speaking of society, I was born into dogma, like we all are, perhaps to understand the difference between personal truth and myth, though both are equally subjective. I guess we have to learn the box exists to truly get out of it. I've been told that I have a way with words, as I should, because they were my first friends to shape my impressions of the world into something symbolic and intangible. Their reckless use inspires destruction, just as their adept use inspires creation. I believe every person must know how to master their words. I know I try to everyday. I lose half my day to dry academia and examinations, I lose my free time being a victim to some prolific writing on the internet or social networking. The rest of time I spend in a happy daze, bubbling conversation and more than a few laughs. I believe imagination is limitless, anger an illusion. I detest cynicism, especially when I see it in people my age.


Day is turning into night, night to day. So, talk, and make me understand your world view. 
We are, after all, a conversation in progress. A deep one, at that. 

Home. :)

Let's give home sweet home a big big hug, here.
Late in the coming, but belated Happy Earth Day everyone.

Here is my Earth Day initiative, which I pledged on the Billion Acts of Green:

"take short showers, and to turn off the tap while brushing."

Yes, I'm keeping it simple. And doable. :)

What are you doing? :)

P.S. Third trimester finals going on. Three days more, and first year of college ends. Just like that. Time does fly. :)

Look who made it to India Today.

Page 16.
India Today, 25th April Edition.
The girl with the STUPID wide-eyed smile with a candle in her hand, and a Gandhian topi on her head. Yeah, that's me. Kshitij (guy in the blue shirt with an equally stupid grin) makes his first appearance in a magazine with nationwide circulation too. Applause.
:P

You > Me

You wake up every morning by 7 a.m. You do yoga. You go swimming. You are fit. You have a nutritious breakfast. You have eight glasses of water in a day. You know how to cook. You know how to drive. You are confident travelling alone by local train. You do not splurge money on fast food, and regret it the moment you're full. You are not begging your mom for more pocket money by the middle of the month. You know exactly where your watch is, and don't leave it lying around in drawers all around the house. You have an Android phone. You have an effortless writing style, and a sleek looking blog. You've shifted to Wordpress, and have no sentimental attachment with Blogger. You don't write to be read, you write because you love it. You make it a point to read, inspite of your busy schedule. You are not obscenely obsessed with social networking.You know when it's time to get off Facebook and study. You don't get irritated when people use your instead of you're, or it's instead of its. You don't point out in the most pedantic way possible, that it is Goo-chee, not Gucky. You have in-depth knowledge of certain subjects, not just random trivia about the same. You do not care about your ex-best friend, and what she's doing and if she ever thinks of you. You are not secretly jealous when friends go on road-trips, or stay out till 12 a.m. You don't cry about the dearth of like-minded people in your age demographic. You don't suffer from an inferiority complex every time you meet him. You don't smile inadvertently while delivering bad news about someone you don't like too much. You know exactly how to react to every situation. You have never used your knowledge of 'big' words to get out of a situation. You can take a compliment and critique with equal ease. People don't get to know when you're fake smiling at social gatherings, or in an awkward situation. You don't feel out of place when everyone around you talks about the latest episode of Community of The Big Bang Theory, because you comfortably watch whatever season is on on television. You are quite the social butterfly. Your modesty is not fake, and you never make self-deprecating comments in a pathetic attempt to gain compliments. You know what's right for you. You do not write vapid posts filled with a bunch of your shortcomings glorifying a non-existent individual.

Inspired by Kat Vapid

Cheat Code#1: How to trick examiners into thinking you're making sense.

English is not the mother-tongue of most teachers in the country. Play off that.
Not kidding.
:D

Cheat Code# 1 Know your examiner.
More often than not, (in India's high schools and graduate colleges, at least), you can get away with writing "a cow ate up my notebook" by writing "a bovine creature given God-like status in our magnificent multi-cultural country consumed my notebook in which I had taken copious notes".

Write these words in your examination. I guarantee you high scores.
(That's how I get my marks, anyway.)
:P
1. Non-essential
2. Acrimonious
3. Detrimental
4. Epitome
5. Fastidious
6. Harbinger
7. Misnomer
8. Mercenary
9. Perfunctory
10. Ostentatious
11.Oblivion
12. Propriety
13. Quintessential
14. Cohesive
15. Encumbered
16. Synergy
17. Dynamism
18. Strategic
19. Optimization
20. Endeavor

You may think I am joking, but you will fall at my feet worshiping me when your mark-sheet flashes a 3.8 GPA. 

The Usual.

The alarm goes off. The most annoying sound in the world. You bounce out of bed, make a run for the loo. Teeth brushed in such a hurry, you almost hear the enamel cry through the layer of plaque. The hair laments the lack of conditioner, as your hands reach for the newspaper. Of course, you don't get past the boring headlines of the Times of India, any more than you smirk at the sensational ones Mumbai Mirror dishes out on a daily basis.
You scramble through your scrambled eggs, and with a cold-coffee moustache and a quick smile to your mom affirming you'll be home right back after college, you're out of the house. It's a faster run once you're out. A bored auto-waalaah stands outside the gate, staring shamelessly in your direction. You may think he's being lecherous, but hello, this is Bombay. There's no time even for that. He's more like a hawk zoning in on his prey. He starts the meter even before you sit, and 20 minutes later, you're in college.
Lectures begin and end, but you're so zoned out, that it's almost like you've time-traveled to 3.20 p.m., when college (usually) ends. (Today's paper talks about how India has an 'examination system' as opposed to an 'education system', and in my head I think, how true. Visit a high school. Or a tutorial class, and you'll see.)Time that could have been productive is spent on Facebook, thanks to your innate tendency towards voyeurism. Also,to think up a cool status update. Or, to edit an otherwise crap photo by making it black and white or sepia. The number of likes on either are the greatest determinant of your popularity level, so of course time spent on either is productive time.

I wish life had a Fast Forward button.
But there's that paradox again, right? One grain of rice doesn't make a heap, and ten thousand grains does not make a heap either. So where does that Fast Forward button lead to? I'd love to know.
Any place I can absorb, imbibe, breathe, live would make me happy, thankyouverymuch.

Cities lit by Candlelight. :)

There are times when one knows exactly what to write. From a marvelous opening sentence to a dramatic beginning paragraph, a hooking body and the parting last words. Conditioned to being a student, I tend to ascertain how many marks a discerning English teacher would have given me for my piece of writing. Now, one can argue that I have always been an English teacher favourite, but that is irrelevant, because I do not think of one particular evaluator. I think of how many marks The English Teacher would give me. It's more of an idea, really.

While it leads to some passable writing on the off chance, there are times that it severely constricts thought and the natural fluidity of the language.
So, as I write this post, The English Teacher remains but an illusion at the back of my mind that I do not care one bit about. I would not want to be evaluated on this one.

Had you asked me what the Jan Lokpal Bill was a month ago, I would have done one of the following.
1) Honestly said I don't have a clue and frantically Googled it.
2) Lied somewhat believably that I've heard about it somewhere but don't exactly know what it is.

Well, I hadn't a clue about it till I watched an impassioned debate on Times Now a little over a week ago. The very idea that corruption could be tackled in such a systematic, effective manner was incredible. An organisation independent of all judicial and political pressure, that could bite corruption at all levels excited even the most politically uninterested. Anna Hazare's commitment to all ideas liberal, has been an eye-opener.

( I first heard about him in a rather dreary Political Science lecture over 6 months ago, where Professor Bhagwath informed us of his role in getting the Right to Information Act passed in the country. While I admit that I was listening to the Sir's droning voice with half a ear, the name stuck in my head somehow.)

 To witness the bespectacled, simple, stoic and perpetually smiling 73 year old man, who has spent most of his years working for the benefit of the others, undertaking a fast unto death to get the Jan Lokpal Bill passed, was a sight never before witnessed by the nation's youth. It united the country in the way that cricket frenzy, religious ceremonies and Friday releases are known to unite. :)

On 8th April, I participated in a demonstration at Azad Maidan. As soon as college ended, I jumped into a local train (that was so empty at 4 p.m., it was surreal) with Kshitij, Vishant and Prajakta (my awesome possum friends). A man was on stage speaking with great passion about Anna and getting the crowd to scream 'Bharat Mata ki JAIIII!'. Since his identity is unknown, it may be debated whether he really believed his words or was just a minor politician out to gain mileage out of the movement. However, he did get the crowd to shout slogans against 'chors' in the government with great passion. Shabana Azmi, Dia Mirza and Urmila joined in too. A Nehru-like topi with "I am Anna Hazare" printed was being sold for 10 bucks, which we all bought without a thought and squarely placed on our heads. Postcards addressed to the Prime Minister were distributed, in which we all wrote bold statements urging the current government to move change. Kshitij went on to write, "The people are going to win this one". His words seem prophetic in retrospect. :)

From there, we took a taxi to Gateway, where our (surprisingly) politically aware taxi driver pleaded to us saying "Aap is movement ka saath mat chodna. Hum bhi aapke saath judenge." We nodded assent with great passion, which he topped off by saying "Kya mast topi hai". :P

Hundreds gathered in front of the Gatway of India, that served as a magnificent back-drop to the peaceful protest that was shaking the country to its bones. India Against Corruption(IAC) volunteers distributed badges, stickers and white ribbons to every person in the crowd. One by one, the candles, complete with colourful chart paper to protect our hands from the falling wax, were lit, every person sharing their flame with the next. There must have been close to 600 people in the crowd that day, 596 of whom were complete strangers to me. Yet, when we sang the national anthem in our loudest voices, something had dramatically changed. With the moon right above us, and the Taj, the survivor of a brutal terrorist attack, our neighbour, we were all one in wanting the stringent anti-corruption mechanism. All of us. I had never seen, let alone felt, anything like it. It was brilliant. 

We came home dog-tired, just in time to watch the headlines. The government had accepted Anna's demands, and that he would break his fast the next morning. 

I turned 18 just a few months ago. And I have never had much of an interest in politics before. Not until that night, when I witnessed hundreds of candles light up the city, in an effort to drive change. 

It truly was the single most satisfying moment of the year. In a nutshell, that was the day I think I really turned 18.

Proustian Similarities

I just answered all 20 questions of the Proust Questionnaire, and guess what?
The person who answered most like me is the renowned essayist, novelist and commentator on the American condition, Joan Didion. If you don't know her, here's a link.

In fact, 98.95% of my answers matched hers. That sent me on a wild goose chase of sorts. First, I tried looking up her answers to see if they really did match mine. I found two answers hidden in the crevices of slightly pretentiously written articles. But after 20 minutes of frantic typing and scanning pages yielding no result, I gave up matching each answer to mine.

Still fascinated, I Googled her, and this is what her Wikipedia page says.
"She read everything she could get her hands on after learning how to read and even needed written permission from her mother to borrow adult books, biographies especially, from the library at a young age. With this, she identified herself as being a "shy, bookish child", who pushed herself to overcome these personal obstacles through acting and public speaking."


She also moved around a lot because her father was involved in World War II.  Now, my father did nothing as dramatic, but I've lived in 7 cities and have been quite a nomad myself.
"Didion states that moving as often as her family did had a profound influence on her, claiming that she often felt like a perpetual outsider."
The moment I read that, I screamed 'I KNOW THAT FEELING!' in my head! 


Freakishly similar. I am not even kidding. :O



Haha, but wait, guess which other famous people answered like me. Little Richard(whaaaaaaaaaaaat?), Conan O' Brian(I always preferred him to Leno) and Sumner Redstone(the guy who owns MTV has to be awesome, even at 87)!


Notice the common thread among them all?
MONEY! Loads and loads of it. They're all filthy rich. :D
Woohoooooooooooooo! I'm finally in the company of the rich and famous. 


My pillow knows I will sleep easy tonight!


P.S. Take the quiz too. On Facebook, if it's more convenient. It's fun!

Priceless.

2nd April 2011.
Exactly 28 years to the day we won our last World Cup.

Dhoni, Bhajji, Sachin and Yuvraj were fearless. They played a brilliant game, and shed happy tears unabashedly in front of 1.2 billion people AT LEAST.

Sachin was carried on the shoulders of the team, the World Cup the bright red cherry on top of his gazillion other accomplishments. Barring the 100th Test ton, his resume is now complete.

Watching the match in the Inorbit Mall Food Court with 5000 frenzied cricket fans who applauded every shot, screamed slogans, blew eardrum-shattering whistles, gasped at every 'Out', abused and flashed a sea of middle fingers at the opposing team, danced drenched with sweat and tears almost as if they were playing each shot themselves; it was one of the greatest nights ever. Even if I don't understand the difference between a googly and a doosra. The madness transcended the mere game, it united a bunch of complete strangers who hugged together, danced together, jumped together in joy when Dhoni ended the game in style with a six.

Feeling blue never felt this great. :) :) :)

To Free Speech.

A thinktank of aloof multiplication

A nicotine wish and a Columbus decanter

Retrenchment and hoggishness

The aristocrat choir sings, "What's the ruckus?"

The haves have not a clue

The immenseness of suffering

And the odd negotiation, a rarity

With onionskin plausibility of life

And a keyboard reaffirmation

-"Bushleaguer"

Now a lot of these lyrics don't make much sense to me. They're just a bunch of big cool sounding words strung together in a slightly incoherent sentences.

BUT

That's Vedder dancing with a George Bush mask back in '03. It's a song about the then president and his pro-war policies, and absolute disregard for diplomacy. People may have left the stadium, and there may have been a media uproar back in the U.S. about the lyrics and the whole act. Nothing major, though.

If something like this had happened here, old Bal would have had the guy killed mysteriously in a stampede.

Free speech, I love. :)

On a different note, the India-Pakistan WC semifinal is the first match I've watched all the overs of in my entire life. This despite the fact that my grandfather and Papa call each other every time a match is on and And thank god, I did. Because India won beautifully. Can't wait to watch the final tomorrow.