Two Faced Tide.

I feel bored. There is literally nothing to do.

I feel frustrated and stressed. There are literally a million things to do.

I feel smart. Not smarter than anyone specific I know, just smart, when I actually understand how to solve an adjustment in an accounts problem. The fact that I actually understood it myself makes me feel slightly proud. I made a valid point in the debate. I wrote one decent blog post.

I feel dumb. Not dumber than anyone specific I know, just dumb, when I don't crack a similar adjustment in an accounts examination. Is it something I'm just not getting? Why don't I have one single original idea to contribute in the group discussion? I write such crap so often, it's not even funny.

I feel I'm an idealist all through the year.
When the exam results come in, I get back down to a realist.

I feel confused. How and when did it become okay to see someone's face on your computer everyday, but a hello in person would seem suddenly awkward and out of line?

I feel enlightened. I followed that link on that page and now I know more about something than I did a few minutes ago.

I feel useless. I am a part of Generation 'Like'. The lives that thrive on constant validation. You're awesome. Refresh. You're hot. Refresh. You're smart. Refresh. That's what drives morale, right? The casual profile picture copiously cropped and edited. The much thought-over minimalist yet definitive About Me. The seemingly offhand yet oh-so-witty tweet. The self-absorbed, internet-driven socially anxious tribe; yes, we're Generation Like. Not an active player, but yes, I am a citizen of this clan.

I feel conscious about my relevance on the planet. I am a part of driving change in the society I'm in. I think my actions make a difference. I plan my actions to make a difference.

I feel I will look back on this post, and regret it slightly.

And now, I feel I won't.