I Spy :The Elevator Edition

How many times have I traveled by an elevator? Uh, somewhere in the range of a million? I currently reside on the 12th floor, so there's that, then college and malls and airports, the list is long, and honestly, dull.  But that does not stop me, (does anything? :P) from making a few observations on that, on average, 35 second lift ride up or down.

 You might not even know the name of the person standing ten inches from you, (quite the friendly neighbor, I am) but still: You know what he's reading;  his cologne(or its lack thereof) ;  his taste in music coz of course his iPod's volume is turned up high enough that your eardrums are revolting : his cell-phone's ringtone and why will it be anything but 'Tera tera tera suroooooor" and you will surely guess that he's had aloo parathas with spicy chutney for lunch. Whoever first called India the land of spices said it from 'stuck with an Indian in a closed space' experience! 

All at once, it's weird yet completely normal. Here we are, two complete strangers stuck in a closed box for less than a minute and yet we part knowing more random details about each other than many in our friend circle. To think, this is when we haven't even exchanged a single word. 

Move to "Hello" time. The inevitable(not always, ironically!) conversation starter.
The sharp divide between Introverts and Extroverts is a lie. So is the divide between 'tomayto' and 'tomahto', the Montagues and the Capulets, the bibliophiles and the comic book readers. All the people in the world can broadly be divided into two kinds of people- People who chit-chat in an elevator,  and those who don't.

You know the drill if you're in the latter group.  Aimlessly play around with your cell-phone, check your hair if there are mirrors around etc etc. Aaah, the silence does carry the acute weight of discomfort and just waiting to get the hell out! Neutered of even basic conversational skills that I am, the elevator ride just makes me feel the sheer inadequacy of these silly social skills. And, if you fall squarely in group 1, then you absolutely have to make eye contact, fake- smile and nod a silent hello, and wait for Aunty to ask, "How is college?" or "Where is Mumma these days?" before you ask, "Aunty, I haven't seen Pappu in the longest time!" or "Thanks for the lasagna you sent over, it was yummy!"

And oh, how can I even forget the drone of Kenny G elevator music .3 times a day, aaaaaaaargh, I've had enough!

Is it time to get all "I'm going to be a health freak" and take the stairs?

Yeah, we'll see how that goes. :P

P.S. In India, an elevator is called a lift. In case you're not from the country and are wondering why people are waiting for a car to give you a ride while waiting in the line for the elevator. :P